He Was Here First

Do you ever wish your husband would look at you the way he did when you first started dating? Guess what. He probably wishes the same thing sometimes. Instead, he often gets that look you give him when you’re trying to load the dishwasher and he’s standing in the way looking at ESPN on his phone. Do you know that look?

But we’re pulled in a lot of directions. We are distracted by work obligations, raising kids, volunteering, maintaining friendships, and household tasks. Sometimes making time for one more person is just too much. I’m so guilty of putting the hubby on the back-burner. Most of the time he is not getting the kindest, most patient version me. I spend all day trying to be as courteous as possible to everyone else I encounter, then snap at him when I see an innocent pair of dirty socks on the bedroom floor.

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(Photo by Alyssa Crawford Photography)

We know children benefit from observing their parents having positive relationships with their spouse, friends, and family. Still, when we’re taxed and tired, it’s easy to use up all our kindness on everyone but the guy who had all our attention on a second date at a mini golf course many years ago.

We can’t wave a magic wand and create more free time, but what we can do is be more aware of our priorities. Our husbands should be one of them. Weekly date nights aren’t as possible as they were before kiddos, but carving out a few minutes of one-on-one time usually is. Take a minute to appreciate him. Ask him about his day, and actually listen.

I’m trying my best to take this advice because I love this guy so much, and after all, he was here first.

 

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